Entering into a whole new decade was exciting, depressing, promising and terrifying all at the same time. (How is that even possible? Just reading that sentence makes me feel a little bit like that girl. You know, the moody one that is hidden down in the depths of each and every God-fearing, Midol-popping, chocolate-eating woman? Yeah, that one.) But so far, 30 has been good to me.
Challenging..but good. Real good.
I've embraced and rather appreciated the fact that my life currently looks nothing like I thought it would by now. I feel less in control than I ever have, yet each day I grow more and more amenable to the unpredictable path that God has been laying out for me instead. I'm not saying it's easier to follow His path, in fact, the control freak in me tries to make a calculated escape from time to time. But if there's anything that i've learned over the past 10 years, it's that His path is definitely much more fruitful, edifying and stretching. And I like that. I've begun to crave that.
So, as the control freak...er, I mean planner in me looked at the calendar this week, I realized that as of tomorrow, I have exactly 30 days left before I have my first full year in my 30's under my belt.
Wow, how did that happen so fast?
Remember the days when we used to count down until our next birthday? We couldn't wait to get older? In fact, I remember proudly proclaiming that I was ten AND A HALF, or twelve AND A HALF....because it meant that I was that much closer to being a teenager. Let me tell you, those days are long gone. In fact, if you ask me how old I am now, or if you ask me how old I am in 3 years, chances are you just might get the same number...as long as I can get away with it. :)
But I digress...
A friend asked me the other day how I was planning on celebrating my birthday this year, and the more I thought about it, I kind of had to laugh. I think at this point in my life, I have begun to find the idea of making a big deal about me on my birthday kind of odd.... I mean heck, all I did that day was show up. My mom and dad (well mostly mom) did the hard work. (we'll give the doc some credit too)
So this year, I'm not going to celebrate me.
I'm going to celebrate that which has really made me, well....me.
The things/people/places/events/life lessons that have shaped who I am and have led me to the place I am today. I am grateful for another day to be alive, and I am also grateful for the path that has allowed me to have another birthday. Beginning tomorrow, for the next 30 days, I will post about one of these said "game changers" for me each day as a way to both reflect on where God has brought me to this point, and to say thank you to those who have helped keep me alive and out of jail all these years. :)
Because too often we count our troubles more than our blessings...and I never want to lose sight of the fact that I have been abundantly (albeit undeservingly) blessed beyond measure thus far.
Jamie
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